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Coaching: Every week I read that so many of you are feeling flat and disconnected which makes me really sad as I know that feeling too well.

Let’s end the year in a wildly different place together; one where we all feel full of energy, playful, brave and reconnected to the strong, sensual women we are. I’ve decided to run one final coaching cohort for this year. My normal offer is 12 weeks, highly customised and priced at £4,000. But as an early Christmas gift, I’m going to run a mini program and reduce the price to just £349. It’ll run for 8 days from Dec 1st - Dec 8th.

If you’re curious but unsure, or concerned about the price, join a Q&A session through Nov where I’ll share more information and answer any of your questions.

👋 Hey you,

Another week, another check-in.

Tell me how you are, I love hearing from you, it makes me day!

Your Energy Is Lit!

Last week’s poem got a lot of great feedback so I’m including another one that I came across this week. I really loved this one because it speaks to something I believe deeply - in a world that places so much emphasis on external beauty, it’s an act of rebellion to look inward and focus on nourishing our internal beauty through self-reflection, compassion and growth. The biggest compliments I’ve ever had about my ‘beauty’ are always during periods where I feel most alive, never when I’m feeling low but nailed my make up routine. Your energy radiates through you and that is your real beauty.

🗺️ My Exploration This Week

On Sunday, I joined a workshop led by Africa Brooke. Years ago, when I started Ferly, Africa and I sat on a few panels together. I loved her mind and her energy then, but in recent years, she has refined her point of view and exploded on Instagram. Now, she is even more magnetic, authentic and unfiltered.

As you know, I’m currently navigating a transition. No longer who I was, but not yet who I am becoming. Africa’s workshop was on this exact topic. She called it, ‘The Liminal Moment’, otherwise known as, ‘The in-between’.

One of the questions she asked during the workshop was this - What is my body trying to communicate that my mind keeps over riding?

It reminded me of something I read recently which was that our bodies know the truth before our minds catch on.

I then started reading, The Signs, by Tara Swart, a neuroscientist that blends science and spirituality in such a beautiful way. In her book she talks about learning to listen and trust our intuition.

Two years ago, I briefly saw a different therapist. The first thing I shared with her was that I felt like I had two personalities and it was really disconcerting. I had my head persona, and my body persona. One was hyper rational, the other very intuitive and emotional.

As a tech founder, I have always relied on data and logic to guide my decision making. I like things that make sense and follow an order. And Ferly’s whole philosophy was about scientific rigour. That is all head led. There was no space for the body’s clues, the intuition, the gut feel.

So when I saw this therapist and shared I felt split in two, it was because I was suddenly in such misalignment that my body was sending me the loudest prods via a low immune system, gut issues, chronic stress and so much tension.

It’s taken me a long time to try and integrate these two personas because what my body was telling me was so against what my head believed.

Do you ever feel that way?

Since the summer, I’ve been learning to listen and trust my body more and more. It’s been hard and confronting at times. I’ve had to make big changes, let go of lots of deeply held beliefs and start practicing safe ways to act on my intuition so that I can develop that muscle.

Africa’s workshop, and Tara’s book, have been great reminders to keep going on this path.

My question to you this week is this, what is your body trying to tell you that your head doesn’t agree with just yet?

Your Weekly Framework to Turn Yourself On

❓One thing to try

How did you get on with last week’s comfort zone challenge? Were you able to step outside of it and try to be a little bit braver?

This week, I want to encourage you to drop into your body through dance, meditation, breath work, drumming, or singing (or if you’re feeling really brave, a dose of psychedelics). This can be as little as 1 minute a day e.g. throwing on your favourite song whilst you wait for the kettle to boil and wiggling your sexy little toosh around the kitchen.

When you’re dropped in, ask your body a question you’re struggling with and see what comes through for you. You might ask why you’re not feeling so connected to yourself recently…

🗣️ Two questions to ponder

1. What’s my favourite way to drop into my body?

2. What is my body telling me that my mind hasn’t caught up too yet?

📺 Content recommendation

Did anyone watch Minx, the TV show I recommended last week?

Spoiler Alert

I loved it because it felt so relevant. Even though the show was set in the 70’s, I feel like as women and queer folk, we’re still fighting for the same rights and recognition that we were back then.

Even today, the Supreme Court threw out attempts to repeal same sex marriage in the US. And whilst that demonstrates how much progress has in fact been made since the 70’s, it’s crazy to me that we’re even still debating it. And in the case of Roe v Wade, women’s rights are being wound back.

On a different note, I loved it because it celebrated female pleasure! It proved how hungry women were for content that spoke to their sexual wants and needs.

I despise the narrative that women are less sexual than men. When in fact, the truth is that our desire system is different but when we learn to work with it, we unlock a whole new world of sexual appetite. And when we don’t, it’s not that we have low desire, it’s that we don’t desire the sex that we’re having.

And that is something that can be fixed when we learn to drop in, listen to our truest selves and step outside of our comfort zones to communicate what we’ve learnt.

With love,
Billie x

♥️ Personal Support

^{I’m Billie, a certified Holistic Health Coach, Sex Educator and author of the best selling sexual wellness manual, ‘Turn Yourself On’, published by Penguin. I’ve also delivered a TedX on the future of pleasure and co-founded the #1 sexual wellness app, Ferly (where we’ve helped 600,000 women enjoy sex more).}

^{I empower women to enjoy their sex lives, cultivate deeply nourishing relationships and find their power!}

^{I can help you:}

• ^{Turn painful sex into a source of ease and pleasure so your body can finally exhale.}

• ^{Experience orgasm more easily by quieting the noise in your head and reconnecting with your body.}

• ^{Reignite your desire so sex stops feeling like a task and starts feeling like something you genuinely want without the guilt.}

• ^{Rebuild intimacy in your relationship so you feel close again, and separation no longer feels like the only option.}